How Saying No Will Help You Keep Christmas Sane

GUEST POST bt Lisa E. Betz        

The Christmas season is coming. Does that mean your schedule will be busier than ever? School concerts, office parties, holiday baking and decorating… So much to do!

To prevent being swept away by the tide of extra holiday expectations, we need to be intentional about stewarding our time, energy and money. That means saying no to some events in order to say yes to the ones that matter the most.

This is a time of year when many worthy causes are making pleas for our money or our time. We simply cannot do it all, so we must choose wisely. Sometimes that means saying no to activities we’ve done in the past. Our priorities, goals, and needs change over time. That means holiday activities and expectations that made sense in the past may not make sense this year.

“Just because you have always done something does not mean you should always do it.” ~ Joyce Meyer

It’s hard to say no

                                                                                     

We hate to let people down when they assume they can count on us, but when our lives change, so do our priorities. Are you ready to say no to a few things you’ve always said yes to in the past, because they no longer serve you and your family in this season?

Five years ago, I had plenty of free time to volunteer. Various groups could count on me to help with Christmas events. Now I have two books published, I’m running a small business, and assisting my elderly mother.  

This means I can no longer say yes to all the Christmas projects I used to help with. Nor can I do as much decorating and baking at home as I once did. In this season, I must keep my focus on the essential goals and not get pulled into excess activities—which means saying no to some things when people ask

“I know I’m caught in the rip current of people pleasing when I dread saying yes but feel powerless to say no.” ~ Lysa Terkeurst

 

When Should I Say No?    

Here are a few questions we can ask ourselves when deciding which requests are a yes and which are a no.

• Is this event or expectation a priority, or does it belong to a previous phase of my life?
• What important duties am I currently facing? Do I realistically have time for this right now?
• Can I offer to help by doing something that won’t overburden my schedule instead of accepting the old task?
• Is my heart still in this role, or will I be secretly relieved to relinquish it?

 

As you consider when to say no, keep these truths in mind.

·         I shouldn’t hold on to every job title or responsibility I’ve ever had. 

·         Each stage of life has different responsibilities. I must relinquish the old to accept the new. 

·         Declining a task I’ve done previously doesn’t mean I’ve abandoned the cause altogether.

 

How to say it

“I’ve had to cut back on my volunteer efforts, so I no longer have time to help with the concert.”

“I can’t run the holiday bazaar this year, but I could bake some cookies.”

“Caring for my mom is my top priority this year, so I don’t have time to help.”

“I hate to miss your party, but I have family commitments. I’d love to get together after Christmas and you can tell me how it went.”

You can find more examples of how to decline requests with confidence on the free guide, 7 Strategies for Saying No. This easy-to-use guide will help you keep your holiday season sane by providing you with simple strategies to say no politely. Each strategy includes 4 examples of exactly how to say it. Get your FREE 7 Strategies for Saying No here.

Bio     

Lisa E. Betz is an engineer-turned-mystery-writer, entertaining speaker, and unconventional soul. She inspires others to become their best selves, living with authenticity, and purpose, and she infuses her award-winning novels with unconventional characters who thrive on solving tricky problems.

She and her husband reside outside Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, with Scallywag, their rambunctious cat—the inspiration for Nemesis, resident mischief maker in her Livia Aemilia Mysteries. Lisa directs church dramas, eats too much chocolate, and experiments with gluten-free variations of her favorite holiday recipes. Visit lisaebetz.com.

Thank you Lisa!